Sleep Means Going Back
by Darkfire25
Summary: Nico can't sleep and can't fight the feelings that have been bottled up and shaken. A oneshot. Nico, Percy, slight BOO mention, NOT perico, friends only. Rated T for swearing


**Hello, this is an attempt at Nico and Percy. No this is not a Perico fic. This is simply about friendship. Well actually, I wrote this without a plot in mind. Italian translation can be found at the bottom of the fic. Review on my style of character. I'm trying to get a hold on them, but I'm not sure I quite managed.**

Nico stared at his cabin walls. The night had been passing slowly. It was only about the 2:30ish in the morning. He couldn't sleep. Not with memories of Tartartus lingering in the darkness behind his eyelids. He was too nervous to lay down, in fear of sleep. Sleeping meant going back. Sleeping meant running for his life again and not getting away. Sleeping meant sitting in a jar and waiting for Gods knew what. No, he wasn't planning on sleeping. Giving up on staring at the plain walls, the son of Hades got up, grabbed his sword and aviator jacket, and headed out the door. He found himself walking to the beach shore. Maybe it was because of the waves, maybe not. Frankly, he didn't know. He didn't find Percy that attractive anymore. After staying in the infirmary for three days, Nico's feelings for Will Solace had grown. He didn't quite know what to make of it. His feelings scared him. Made him uncomfortable. He shook his head, trying to clear his head or, at least, organize his thoughts. He rubbed his hands together. His bare feet was met with the cold waves of the water. It was soothing and yet chilling. A sigh escaped his pale lips. His wild hair moved with the wind. The black bat-wing tuffs of hair flapping with the change of wind. Nico tried to calm himself, but emotions he kept suppressed and bottle up started bursting inside of him. A hand appeared on his shoulder and Nico turned quickly, pulled his stigyin iron sword from his waist, and let it settle on the neck of Percy Jackson. His chest heaved and Nico realized that Percy had his arms up in a surrender pose.

"Woah there, Nico. Wanna put that very deadly weapon down?" Percy said seriously with his gaze fixed on Nico's blade. Nico's own gaze traveled to his own blade. It was in line with Percy's neck, but not quite touching. Slowly, he pulled away from the son of Poseidon. Percy put his arms down slowly.

"Sorry" Nico whispered. His knees felt like jelly and his arms felt like stones. He lowered himself to the ground, shivering. Pictures of demons attacking from behind shot into his mind. Percy plopped himself down next to the younger on the shore of the water.

"What ya doin' out here?" Percy asked. Nico tried to find an answer but shrugged instead. He felt his insides trying to explode with panic and memories. Percy was watching him. He knew it. He refused to make eye contact. He looked straight ahead at the water. Trying to breathe to the rhythm of the waves. At the same time, he felt like he was going to explode.

"Nico?" Percy asked. He saw Percy reach a hand out but pull back again. "Please talk to me." He murmured. Nico felt dizzy. He wasn't sure if it was from lack of sleep or the residual panic from Percy's sudden appearance.

"Percy", Nico started. Percy snapped alert. "Percy, I can't do it. I can't sleep." He told him. Suddenly, a dam broke. A very old and patched up dam that was waiting to break for a very long time. Nico felt embarrassed when a tear traced down his cheek. He furiously wiped it away with his too pale hands.

"Nico, it's okay." Percy replied. His voice gentle and understanding. A sob tore from the son of Hades. His body shook. He curled in on himself. Percy came forward and pulled the crying boy closer. Nico's eyes snapped to the sea-green eyes that were Percy's.

"They dragged me down, Percy. I tried so hard to get away. I fought so _hard_ and for so _long_. And then, then...I didn't know where to go or what to do. I was alone. I'm alone. They were everywhere. Their claws and teeth and, Percy, what was I supposed to do! I crawled of out that fucking place into a trap. They wanted information I didn't have. They hurt me. They put me in a jar. Then they want a show! A fucking show! Is this what I am to these Gods? A play thing?!" Nico yelled. "Io non posso andare avanti. Non posso."(1) Nico then whispered. Percy wrapped his arms around the smaller boy. Nico tensed for a moment, but he then melted in to the warmth Percy offered. Nico's pale hands gripped Percy's green t-shirt. Percy was wearing his pajamas. He sobbed. "Why can't the Gods Lasciami in pace. Io non ask for any of this."(2) Nico cried, slipping in and out of Italian. Percy could grasp the main concept of his ramblings, but Percy was not fluent in Italian. Or like knew any Italian.

"I know, Nico. I'm sorry." He comforted. He never had to comfort the son of Hades, so Percy was at loss of what to do. He held the younger boy and listened to him, whispered little nothings into his ear, and made sure that Nico was as comfortable as he could be. Nico was never the person to fall apart. He ran. Even when Nico was ten years old, he had run when his sister had died. After all Nico had gone through, Percy realized how strong he was.

"Hanno ancora mi ossessionano la notte, e, non importa quello che faccio, sono lì. Sono dentro la mia testa, e non andrà via. Mi strappare a parte ogni notte più e più volte. Io non sono una cosa per essere giocato con e utilizzati per l'intrattenimento, giusto Percy?" Nico asked looking at him. Nico's brown eyes were red brimmed. Percy stopped. That last part sounded like a question, and his name was at the end of it.

"Could you say that in english, Nico?" Percy asked. He watched as Nico gave him a confused look. He then realized that Nico didn't notice he was not speaking english.

"I'm not something to be played with and used for entertainment, right Percy?" Nico asked again, his gaze lowering. Percy was shocked at how vulnerable Nico was. The normally strong boy was now a shattered kid. Percy thought about that. Nico was only 14. A kid who grew up too fast. Nico whimpered and Percy remembered he was asked a question.

No, Nico. You are not a toy. You are an amazing person who cares so much more than others. You are the reason we are still alive. You connected both the camps. You went to find the Doors of Death on your own. You survived Tartarus and being captured by giants. You did things that the Gods themselves were afraid to do." Percy informed him. Nico nodded. He leaned against Percy. His felt numb now. He didn't have any strength to get up. He hoped Percy didn't mind. Maybe he should move? He pushed his tired arms up and tried to haul his body away from the warmth that was Percy Jackson.

"I'm sorry. I I" Nico stuttered. His voice died out.

""Your fine, Nico." Percy said and once again opened his arms. "I don't mind."

"Percy, you don't have to. It's like 3 in the morning and I'm just keeping you up." Nico explained to him. Percy gave a small frown.

"Nico, I wasn't sleeping either." Percy confessed. Nico looked at Percy. A vulnerable look in his brown eyes, and Percy had to look away.

"I'm sorry. Here I am being a selfish asshole. I-"

"Nico, please. I'm not perfect, but I have people I talk to. I don't bottle it in. Nico, you can't keep it inside. It'll eat you alive." Percy said. Nico felt tears welling up again. Nico knew it was.

"accidenti queste lacrime"(4) Nico whispered wiping his tears. Percy again looked at him funny.

"English please?" He asked. Nico sighed.

"I said damn these tears, and sorry about the language thing. When I'm upset...I get confused..I speak Italian more than English and yeah, well I speak english a lot, but for about 70 years...ya know" Nico answered as his body relaxed once again. His eyes were slipping closed, open, closed, open. They felt so heavy.

"I didn't know that" Nico heard Percy announce softly. He wasn't sure if Percy was talking to him or himself.

"You don't know a lot of things about me." Nico reminded him. Percy seemed to contemplate that. Nico was a mysterious person. He knew very few things about Nico and his past, his personal interests, and other key items about Nico.

"I would like to." Percy responded truthfully. Nico gave a slight shout as Percy picked him up from his position of leaning on the son of the sea. Percy collected the smaller boy in his arms and started walking away from the waves.

"Where are we going?" Nico asked, opening his eyes. When did he close them again? Percy was carrying him like a princess, which he was definitely not, but Nico was too tired to protest.

"Your cabin. I'm assuming you don't want to sleep in mine, but we are having a sleepover." Percy told him in a way that left no room for argument. He thought about it for a moment. A sleepover with Percy? A thought made Nico uncomfortable.

""Would that bother you, Percy?" Nico asked suddenly. Percy looked down at him.

"Having a sleepover with you? No. Why would it matter?" Percy asked. Nico's face was twisted and got red. It clicked in Percy's head just what Nico was asking.

"Because I'm-"

"Nico, that doesn't change anything. You know that right?" Percy asked him. Nico got quiet. Percy sighed. They reached the Hades cabin and Percy carried Nico to his bed.

"Nico, we have some things to talk about." Percy reminded him. Nico wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his chin on his knees. "Nico, I know that you are gay. I know that you had a crush on me and-"

"I'm sorry. I'm making things difficult, aren't I?" Nico asked suddenly. Percy could tell he was trying to avoid the subject. Nico began to take his aviator jacket off. He threw it across the room.

"No, Nico. I just don't want any awkwardness with you. I think of you as a close friend, and I would like for you to think of me as one as well. I understand if there are still feelings you have to sort out, but I hope we could be close" Percy said. Nico seemed a little shocked.

"I, I, That, that means a lot to me, Percy. I am over you. I told you that. I just, I'm not comfortable with myself yet. That is something I have to work out for myself." Nico rambled, not making eye contact. Percy laid himself on Nico's bed. It smelled of damp earth. It was a good smell. There was also a hint of something else that was pure Nico. He wasn't sure what it was. Nico then laid down next to Percy, which surprised the older one at first. Nico fumbled around for a moment then dropped something on the floor next to the bed. Percy looked. It was his sword. He heard Nico sigh. He wanted to ask Nico more, but, when he opened his mouth to talk, he noticed Nico had fell asleep. Percy smiled. Nico just need people to support him. He needed friends. Percy was going to be just that. His sea-green eyes closed as he too slept soundly

**That is it for now. The translations are on the bottom. I got them from google, so anything wrong is not on me. What did you think? Review, please?**

(1) (I can't go on. I can't)

(2) (leave me alone, I didn't)

(3) (They still haunt me at night, and, no matter what I do, they are there. They are inside my head, and they won't go away. They rip me apart every night over and over. I'm not something to be played with and used for entertainment, right Percy?)

(4) (damn these tears)


End file.
